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5.8: The Blood

The Lowlifes lose control.

Transcript is below the cut!

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Transcript provided by Ria Couoh.
**************

(00:00) INTRO:

HANNAH
Hi, everyone! Hannah here.
A content warning before we start: this episode contains a panic attack (02:33—03:10).
If you need to check the transcript before listening, you can always do so at thegoblinshead.com/listen.
Please take care of yourselves.
Let’s go to the Inn.

(00:16): PREVIOUSLY ON…

TESSA
Previously on Inn Between…

Inn Between theme plays in the background.

MAX
I heard tell about goblins in the area.

RUKES
I’ll believe it when I see it.

YAK
Don’t worry, goblins are no problem.

Distant crowd roaring.

PHOEBE
What about that many goblins?

YAK
That… might be a problem.

Inn Between theme fades.

(01:18) THE BLOOD.

Door creaks open suddenly.
Background sounds of a tavern.
Several sets of footsteps, one with crutches.

RUKES
Hold still!

YAK
Just getting inside! It’s cold out!

RUKES
(irritated)
It will take literal seconds to heal you if you just stand still!

YAK
Give me a minute. It’s freezing!

Footsteps stop.

PHOEBE
(concerned)
It’s… not that cold out.

MAX
(on the verge of annoyance)
She’s going into shock again! They always do this.

LARKIN
Oh my gods, Yak, you have to let them heal you!

RUKES
Shock! You hear that? Shock!

YAK
It doesn’t hurt!

RUKES
Of course it doesn’t hurt! It’s shock!

MAX
Yak! Just sit down and take your medicine!

YAK

(hesitant)
I… don’t think I can sit down…?

RUKES
(bitingly)
How do you people survive when you’re so stupid?

PHOEBE
Why not?

YAK
Because of the way I’m… kind of… holding myself together here?

LARKIN
(fumbling, scared)
Uh… Wh…? I…! I thought you were just grazed!

YAK
Not exactly.

RUKES
Let me see.

Wet, fleshy squelch.

LARKIN
(quiet hiss)

RUKES
Sune on a spit!

PHOEBE
(terrified)
Yak, are you okay?

RUKES
Sit down. Now.

YAK
(slightly woozy)
Yeah… okay.

Chairs scrape against wooden floor.

MAX
(offhandedly)
You’ve had worse than this.

(02:33)

LARKIN
(quiet, short sigh)

YAK
Yeah, well, I’ve had better.

RUKES
Hold still.

LARKIN
(shorter and shorter breaths)

RUKES
Organs on the inside, please.

Magic crackles.

YAK
(relieved sigh)
Oh… Oh, sure. Now it hurts.

MAX
Better?

YAK
Much. Thanks, Rukes.

RUKES
It was literally the least I could do.

LARKIN
(shuddering, gasping breaths)

PHOEBE
Larkin?

RUKES
Hey, what’s wrong?

LARKIN
I—I—I—I… Uhm…

MAX
Come on! Out with it!

LARKIN
(shakily)
I—I need to go outside.

YAK
Why—

(03:10)

Footsteps hurry out.

RUKES
Odd.

YAK
Do you think he needed to be sick?

MAX
(incredulous)
This is his job! He should be used to it!

YAK
Come on, Max. That… That one was pretty gruesome.

MAX
It wasn’t even that much blood!

Large explosion goes off.

YAK
Holy Molt!

RUKES
What on earth?

MAX
You didn’t leave any of your explosives outside, did you?

PHOEBE
(slightly offended)
Of course not!

YAK
It would be kind of funny if you managed to blow him up again.

PHOEBE
No, it wouldn’t!

Door creaks open.
Slow, measured footsteps growing near. Chair scrapes against wooden floor.

LARKIN
(no longer frantic)
Is the wound mended?

YAK
Yeah, you can look.

LARKIN
No—no. No, thank you. Uhm… I’m glad you’re feeling better.

RUKES
Mallon, what was that?

YAK
You know you smell like toast, right?

LARKIN
Uhm.
(with an edge of nervous laughter)
I’m n… I’m not sure what you’re talking about.

MAX
How about this? You better figure it out, because I need an explanation.

LARKIN
It’s nothing.

MAX
What we just heard wasn’t nothing.

YAK
Not to mention the fact that I think that was a panic attack.

LARKIN
(detachedly, distantly)
No. No. Not at all.

RUKES
(quietly)
Give them something, Mallon.

PHOEBE
Larkin, please?

LARKIN
(forcefully)
No. It was nothing. It’s fine.

MAX
Oh! Oh, I see.

LARKIN
What? What is it?

MAX
Our sorcerer lost control.

LARKIN
(panicked)
No! Max, no.
(with forced neutrality)
That’s not true.

MAX
Give it a rest.

LARKIN
(growing frantic, almost scared)
You don’t know what you’re talking about, okay? You hired me to be the magic expert, remember? And I said—

MAX
No, I remember. You said you were completely under control.

LARKIN
I am.

MAX
Unless you see blood, right?

LARKIN
No! No. That’s not—

MAX
There’s a very easy way to test this, Larkin. And I think you know that.

LARKIN
I—I don’t—

MAX
(pointedly)
I think you’ve still got blood in your hands, don’t you, Yak?

YAK
I… do, yeah.

MAX
I’d be glad to believe you and… drop the subject, Larkin, if you just… shake her hand.

Beat.

LARKIN
I can explain.

MAX
No, you can’t! Unless you’re going to tell me you lied. Is that what you’re going to say?

LARKIN
I didn’t—I didn’t lie. I—

MAX
(sharply)
You just didn’t tell the whole truth.
(condescendingly)
Your magic is under control, sure, unless something goes even a little wrong and you see some gore.

LARKIN
Okay, look—

MAX
I’ve been adventuring for a long time, Larkin. Your one exception is fairly common.

YAK
How have you avoided seeing blood so far?

LARKIN
I don’t look.

YAK
(incredulous)
You don’t look. How do you just not look when you kill someone?

LARKIN
I’ve never killed anyone! And when you do…
(shakily)
I don’t look.

RUKES
Almost impressive that you managed to make it this far living like that.

MAX
(angrily)
And how did you imagine you would hide that from us for this entire quest?

LARKIN
You said it wasn’t going to be dangerous!

MAX
But accidents happen! Like they did today!
(scoffs)
Honestly, I’m hurt that you lied, but I’m mostly disappointed that we’ll have to find another magic expert.

LARKIN
W—Wait a second!

MAX
You’re a major liability! You have to know that, right?

LARKIN
No–! Now, wait! Can’t we talk about this?

MAX
(derisive)
What’s there to talk about, Larkin?

PHOEBE
Accommodations.

MAX
(flatly)
Accommodations.

PHOEBE
There’s no difference, really, between my limitations and his!

MAX
He could go off like one of your explosives if he sees blood!

PHOEBE
My explosives aren’t always reliable either! And, also, he didn’t just go off right away, he made it outside first!

MAX
But, Phoebe, if we get into a situation where he—

PHOEBE
(with growing passion)
What if we get into a situation where we have to run for our lives? I can’t! What if I lose my crutches and can’t move? What if I’m stuck and my cannon blows up again?

RUKES
(small chuckle)
At least Larkin can’t inadvertently blow himself up.

PHOEBE
Exactly!

MAX
This doesn’t change the fact that Larkin lied to me! To all of us.

RUKES
(scoffs)
What are you going to do, Max? Find another arcane expert out here in the sticks?

MAX
(venomous)
No, but I could shed some dead weight.

RUKES
And just guess at which piece of the dragon’s hoard is your… Staff of Storms?

PHOEBE
What if it’s intentionally crafted to be plain-looking?

MAX
You’d figure it out, Phoebe.

PHOEBE
I could make one. A simple version. I don’t know if I could pick the most powerful staff out of a set.

RUKES
Oh, true! I bet a dragon that likes to fiddle has more than one magic staff.

YAK
Why do you two want Larkin to stay so much?

PHOEBE
I just… You can’t keep me and not keep him. It’s not fair.

RUKES
She said it! It’s not fair.

MAX
(derisive)
Larkin, you are one lucky son of a—

YAK
Max, for whatever it’s worth, I think you’re making the right choice.

LARKIN
(quietly)
Thank you.

MAX
That all you have to say?
(irate)
Gods!

Chair scrapes against wooden floor.

MAX
Yak, can I speak with you at the bar?

YAK
Yeah, sure.

Chair scrapes against wooden floor. Footsteps fading away.

LARKIN
(deep, heavy sigh)

PHOEBE
(gently)
Are you okay?

LARKIN
Is Yak gone?

RUKES
They’re gone.

LARKIN
(weary)
Good. I—I just… Blood.

RUKES
Yeah, we noticed.

PHOEBE
You look exhausted.

LARKIN
Yeah. It’s a… It’s a lot of energy, right? It’s always… It’s always near the surface, close at hand, but if I use it all at once it just leaves me…

RUKES
Spent?

LARKIN
I’m so tired.
(beat)
You didn’t have to speak up for me.

RUKES
Oh, no, you were doing a great job on your own.

LARKIN
I’m being serious.

PHOEBE
I meant it! It wasn’t fair. Although, you… probably should have said something.

LARKIN
They said it wouldn’t be dangerous! I thought it was a non-issue.

RUKES
(scoffs)
You people continue to amaze me, the way you just don’t think things through.

PHOEBE
Still, if the sight of blood makes you lose control—

LARKIN
I don’t…!
(even-tempered)
Lose control.

RUKES
Mallon, you just did.

LARKIN
No, you…
(fiercely)
You don’t understand, right? I can’t lose control. I can’t!

RUKES
Or else what?

LARKIN
Or else it’s over! Everything! All of it!

PHOEBE
Rukes?

RUKES
(sigh)
Right.

LARKIN
Right, what?

RUKES
Never you mind. Something broke you a long time ago and that’s not my problem.

LARKIN
You still defended me to Max, though.

RUKES
Yeah, well, I owed you, didn’t I?

PHOEBE
For what?

RUKES
Larkin’s been… teaching me some… arcana.

LARKIN
Did I thank you yet?

RUKES
Not yet.

LARKIN
Well, thank you, then, and thank you, Phoebe.

PHOEBE
(warmly)
Of course! I really don’t think we can do this without your help.

RUKES
You’ve talked a lot today.

PHOEBE
Oh! I… Yes! I suppose.

RUKES
Why’s that, I wonder?

PHOEBE
Something… Something Yak said.

RUKES
Feeling a little more safe?

PHOEBE
(brightly)
Yes.

RUKES
Mm… I’d be careful if I were you.

PHOEBE
Why?

RUKES
Max doesn’t seem to have any qualms about letting us go, even if he likes you.

PHOEBE
He likes me?

LARKIN
They listen to you.

PHOEBE
Oh.

RUKES
They’re fickle. That’s all I’m saying.

LARKIN
A real lowlife.

RUKES
(quietly)
Takes one to know one.

Background sounds of tavern fade away.

(11:44) OUTRO:
(11:44) NEXT TIME ON…

Inn Between theme plays in the background.

TESSA
Next time, on Inn Between…

LARKIN
I’m not a lowlife! I wish you’d stop calling me that.

RUKES
(amused)
Is that so? You really believe that?

YAK
There’s an ambush point ahead.

MAX
We’ll be ready.

(11:59) CREDITS:

HANNAH
This episode, “The Blood”, was written by Hannah Wright, and directed by Jordan Kalina and Hannah Wright with assistant director William Wright. The show is produced and edited by Katherine Ayers.
The voice of Larkin is Mason Amadeus. The voice of Max is Malcolm Jay. The voice of Phoebe is Soulara Jane Joslin. The voice of Yak is Emma Laslett. The voice of Rukes is CJ Tanuan.
Our theme song is by Eli Hamada McIlveen, and our artwork is by Gabrielle Buxman. Our transcriber is Ria Couoh. Special thanks to Emma Wright for foley assistance.
Transcripts for this and every episode can be found on our website, thegoblinshead.com.
If you like the show, put some antiseptic on that cut there. Or leave us a review. Or, actually, both!
Thanks for listening!

Music ends.

HANNAH
This story was created in the traditional territory of the Arapaho, Cheyenne, and Ute peoples, and edited in the unceded territory of the Salish, Kootenai, and Kalispel peoples.

(13:13) POST-CREDITS:
Background sounds of tavern.

MAX
(angrily)
Where were you for that discussion?

YAK
(exhausted)
Trying to keep my entrails from leaking out. Why?

MAX
They teamed up!

YAK
What are you talking about?

MAX
Phoebe and Rukes jumped to defend Larkin! Why?

YAK
Because they had some good points to make?

MAX
Oh, come on! You can’t think it’s a good idea to bring a timebomb with us!

YAK
Max…
(pause)
Maximilian. Phoebe has an entire sack full of timebombs?

MAX
Ugh.

YAK
You’re mad that he lied, that’s all.

MAX
Why shouldn’t I be?

YAK
Being an adventuring party is… not a competition. You have to cooperate with the lowlifes you’ve got.

MAX
We’ll see about that.

Background sounds of tavern fade away.

EPISODE ENDS.

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