Our heroes get the inside scoop.
Transcript is below the cut!
TESSA
Previously on Inn Between…
Inn Between theme plays in the background.
CASTOR
Isn’t Belling the town with the blood feud?
ROSIE
Is… this the same inn?
KNOWLES
The inn thinks we’re interesting.
CASTOR
There’s still too much we don’t know…
Inn Between theme fades away.
Background sounds of tavern.
CASTOR
I’m just saying, it’s a little creepy.
KNOWLES
It’s not that creepy, it’s flattering!
ROSIE
To be fair, one person’s flattering is another person’s creepy.
CASTOR
You don’t think it’s creepy that a building seems to have a preference in patrons? And follows them around?
ZARA
(slowly)
I’m… starting to see his point.
CASTOR
(freaking out)
Is it sentient? What does it know about us? Why us?
KNOWLES
I think this is the most I’ve heard you talk about something that’s not demons since we’ve met, Castor.
TODE
(considering)
Mmm… I’m curious about its sentience as well. Does it imprint on people, like a duckling? Or is its consciousness more complex than that?
ZARA
If it follows people around that aren’t us… what are its criteria?
CASTOR
Exactly!
(quickly)
What does it want?
KNOWLES
How do you know it… wants anything?
TODE
Perhaps it’s…
(pleased with himself)
Bored.
ZARA
Bored?
TODE
(brightly)
You see? Because it’s made of…
CASTOR
(groans of displeasure)
TODE
Boards!
ROSIE
(disgusted booing)
KNOWLES
(laughs)
Door creaks open.
FINA
(distantly)
Oh my gods! Guys! Look!
ROSIE
Fina?
VELUNE
(joyful)
My, it’s the Goblin’s Head!
BETTY
(warmly)
Mmm… home.
ROSIE
(calling out)
Fina! Betty!
FINA
Rosie!
(getting closer)
No way!
KNOWLES
(whispering)
That’s Betty!
ZARA
I gathered.
KNOWLES
(fervently)
You don’t understand. That’s Betty.
FINA
(close now)
This must be the crew!
VELUNE
(pleasant)
Are you the demonologist, young man?
CASTOR
(hesitant)
Uh… yes. Castor Acroterion.
(high-pitched)
How… did you know?
VELUNE
Lucky guess.
(brightly)
Hello, Tode! Oh, it’s so good to see you!
TODE
(warm with sincere friendship)
Velune! My old friend, you are looking well!
VELUNE
As are you! Is that a new rat’s nest?
TODE
(excited, pleased)
Yes, it is! Thank you for noticing.
FINA
So, you’re Zara, then?
ZARA
Guilty as charged.
ROSIE
(playful)
Careful what you say there…
FINA
(chuckles)
Yeah, don’t wanna take that out of context!
BETTY
You the guard?
KNOWLES
Y—Yes! Yes, ma’am!
BETTY
What’s your name?
KNOWLES
Knowles. Sergeant… Sergeant Teric Knowles, ma’am.
FINA
Do you think the sergeant could stand up straighter, Rosie?
ROSIE
They could probably manage it!
KNOWLES
(deadly serious)
You think so?
VELUNE
We were rather hoping we would find you on the way to Belling.
FINA
Yeah, folks! We’ve got intel for you.
CASTOR
Intel…?
Chairs scoot.
VELUNE
We know Sterling and Meltyre gave you an overview of what was happening.
FINA
But we’ve got additional details to fill in.
ZARA
It would be nice to be a little more prepared about what we’re supposed to be doing here.
BETTY
Not sure we can help with that.
FINA
This all might mean something to you but… doesn’t mean anything to us!
ROSIE
Thus, you hiring us?
FINA
Exactly.
ZARA
So, what’s the intel?
BETTY
Mostly background.
FINA
If I may be so bold, I have prepared for you… a poem! This is how the feud started! Ahem!
(the poem is rhythmic and gets faster and faster with every line)
The Adrines and the Carriors were friendly long ago,
But the horse of Mitchell Carrior all the sudden went all slow.
So, he blamed Anise Adrine and he called her witch and worse!
But Anise denied the claim and threatened Mitchell with a curse.
And the curses kept on coming, and dogs, cows, cats were killed,
And each family blamed the other, and someone burned down the mill!
Bickers turned to violence quickly, fight your neighbor or get hit,
And the situation on the whole is really kind of—
ZARA
Stop.
FINA
(disappointed)
Aw… spoilsport!
ZARA
(disbelieving)
This all started with a horse?
FINA
I know, right?
VELUNE
That’s part of the reason we’re fairly sure that this isn’t just people being cruel to each other.
FINA
Yeah… Anise Adrine and Mitchell Carrior have been dead for almost a hundred years, but… everyone’s real certain that they were… upstanding, kindhearted, compassionate people! They were friends.
KNOWLES
(confused)
But the official reason is that Mitchell Carrior’s horse was too slow?
BETTY
Maybe.
FINA
That’s what everyone says, but all we’re really sure is that he and Anise Adrise started arguing and calling each other names.
VELUNE
The escalations are curious too.
FINA
You go from curses to people’s pets and livestock being killed and displayed.
VELUNE
Animal abuse to setting the mill on fire.
BETTY
Arson to murder.
KNOWLES
They’re too abrupt.
CASTOR
That’s why you think the feud is being acted upon by outside forces?
VELUNE
Well… that’s part of the reason.
ZARA
And the other part?
VELUNE
Ah, yes. I have… some small ability to see the unseen. It isn’t always completely comprehensive, but it is reliable.
TODE
What did you see, old friend?
VELUNE
That’s a bit difficult to describe. But it was as if… something had taken root. Something insidious.
ZARA
Something like what?
VELUNE
I don’t know, all I’m sure of is that it’s not divine in origin. And it didn’t feel like standard wizardry.
BETTY
Felt wrong, though. Everyone felt… wrong.
FINA
Yeah, the vibes were weird. Listen, is any of this helpful?
ROSIE
Good question.
ZARA
What about physical evidence? Or… magical looking incidents?
VELUNE
Unfortunately, we didn’t stay long enough to do any serious investigating to that end.
FINA
We had a prior engagement.
BETTY
There were pirates.
FINA
Ey! Spoilers!
KNOWLES
(swooning)
Gods, that’s impressive…
ROSIE
What do you think, experts?
CASTOR
Hmm…
ROSIE
These escalations, do they follow any discernible pattern? Are the intervals between escalations regular at all?
FINA
Not as far as we can tell.
TODE
These suggests to me that there is sentience behind this trouble.
ZARA
I agree. It seems like more of a someone than a something.
CASTOR
Which rules out a fungus or a parasite, right?
TODE
I would posit that, yes.
ROSIE
That makes it all a bit more complicated, doesn’t it?
KNOWLES
Not necessarily. You can’t really arrest a fungus…?
ROSIE
(flatly)
I think if you tried to arrest a demon, I would sell tickets.
FINA
(chuckles)
You know, sweetheart? I think we hired the right crew for the job.
BETTY
Yup.
KNOWLES
(starstruck)
That’s… that’s really kind of you to say.
ZARA
Do you have anything else for us?
VELUNE
I’m afraid that’s about all we can help you with. Unless you have more specific questions?
CASTOR
(slowly, nervously)
I have a question… on a… different matter? That is still pressing.
VELUNE
Certainly.
CASTOR
Why does the inn follow us around?
VELUNE
(understanding)
Oh…
ZARA
Would you really call that pressing, Castor?
CASTOR
(yes!)
We don’t understand its motives!
BETTY
Tessa says it’s because it likes you.
CASTOR
And how does she know that, exactly?
FINA
(pensive)
You know, I have thought about this a lot?
Thoughtful guitar strumming.
FINA
Maybe it’s easier to conceptualize, now that I’m not here all the time. But… something about this place… feels like home. Like the building embodies the concept of home.
Guitar stops.
FINA
It’s like…
(slowly, losing confidence)
Something, something… home loving you back? I don’t know.
BETTY
What are you talking about?
FINA
It’s… still a work in progress.
ZARA
(dry)
Sorry, home?
KNOWLES
This place is hardly home.
ROSIE
I mean… it’s nice, but still.
VELUNE
There is more to home than a building. Even a sentient one.
ROSIE
People always say stuff like that.
ZARA
(derisive)
Sentimental.
FINA
Maybe… but they’re right.
ROSIE
When did you get so soft, Butterbuns?
FINA
(laughs)
Since this inn started following me around.
TODE
What more is there to home, then?
BETTY
People.
A small pause.
ZARA
(scoffs)
Hah!
TODE
(slowly)
I don’t think that applies to everyone.
CASTOR
This still doesn’t answer my question! What does the inn want from us?
BETTY
Nothing.
CASTOR
(getting increasingly freaked out)
If it’s sentient, it makes choices based on personal needs or desires! And if it has desires—
FINA
Seriously, Acroterion, it doesn’t want anything.
CASTOR
It doesn’t make any sense!
VELUNE
I believe I understand your concern, Castor. And I hope that you’ll trust me when I say that you have nothing to fear.
CASTOR
I haven’t adequately explained my concerns!
VELUNE
(emphatically)
You don’t have to.
A pause.
FINA
So, anyway… We can’t stay the night, we’ve got somewhere to be, but can we buy everyone a round?
KNOWLES
I’ll never say no to that.
BETTY
While you’re on a duty?
KNOWLES
(sheepish)
Well…
(clears throat)
It takes me more than one drink to knock me flat, ma’am.
BETTY
Good.
ROSIE
(playful and friendly)
Now, Fina Butterbuns of the Hiltshire Butterbuns, are you going to tell us about pirates or not?
FINA
Oh, now, I can’t turn down a request like that!
(performance mode)
Ladies and gentlemen, friends beyond binary… Have you ever seen anyone call down radiant magical light upon six pirates at once? All while seasick?
KNOWLES
Can’t say I have…
ZARA
(humored)
Who did that?
VELUNE
I’m afraid my guts just aren’t what they used to be.
Playful guitar.
FINA
Allow me to set the scene…
Guitar fades out.
Background noise fades out.
OUTRO (10:20):
Inn Between theme plays in the background.
TESSA
Next time, on Inn Between…
TODE
We’re out of the woods now! Literally!
CASTOR
(discouraged)
And back to ridges and hills…
KNOWLES
I don’t like the look of this road.
ROSIE
Are we a team, then? Or aren’t we?
CREDITS (10:37):
HANNAH
This episode, “The Intel”, was written and directed by Hannah Wright with assistant director William Wright. The show is produced and edited by Katherine Ayers.
The voice of Castor is Caleb Del Rio. The voice of Zara is Quin Leigh. The voice of Tode is Anthony Morales. The voice of Rosie is Lucille Valentine. The voice of Knowles is JV Hampton-VanSant.
This episode featured the voices of our old friends: Kaleigh Cristopher as Betty, Riley Jones as Fina and Kira Mills as Velune.
Fina’s guitar was played by Eli Isbel, and our theme song is by Eli Hamada McIlveen, and our artwork is by Gabrielle Buxman. Our transcriber is Ria Couoh.
Transcripts for this and every episode can be found on our website, thegoblinshead.com.
Find and follow us on Twitter, @inn_between_. Or support us on patreon, at patreon.com/thegoblinshead.
If you like the show, just… simply become a legendary hero, no big deal. Or leave us a review.
Thanks for listening!
Music ends.
POST-CREDITS (11:36):
Tavern sounds.
Guitar playing in the background.
TESSA
(fondly)
Ah, this seems right…
Background noise and guitar fade away.
EPISODE ENDS.